All The Gundam Pilots on An Island
by Chibi Washu
Summary: We put all the GW pilots on an island for a day, and watched what happened. Please don't flame me, I wrote this out of boredom. Please R and R!
1. Morning

gw1

**All the Gundam Pilots On An Island  
******I do not own Gundam Wing, I will never own Gundam Wing.  
  
  


:some dumb Destiny's Child music comes on::  
I'm a survivor!  
  
Narrator: Welcome to Gundam Wing: The Island! We stuck all the happy peppy Gundam pilots on an island together, and filmed what they did.  
You find some of these revelations disturbing, so I suggest you put your parents...  
  
Wufei: Just get on with it baka!  
  
Narrator: Sheesh.......  
  
(Morning)  
  
Wufei: *yawn* NANI!?  
  
Duo: Mornin' sleepyhead, do you know where the heck we are?  
  
Heero: On an island south of South City....oops, wrong show.  
  
Wufei: *thwap* OUR show is better than that DragonBall Z thingy!  
  
Duo: You actually watched it?  
  
Heero: Yuh huh, it was on Toonami's Rising Sun.  
  
Duo: YOU WATCH TOONAMI!? ARGH! *thwaps Heero with a spatula*  
  
Heero: *mutters* Baka......  
  
Duo: Fine then, so, why the hell are we on this crappy island?  
And who is making us do this?  
Why is the sky blue?  
Why do I keep asking so many questions?  
  
Heero: Because you're a long haired freak.  
  
Duo: Ohhhh....... HEY!  
  
Heero: Hehe.....  
  
Duo: Miha.... anyhoo, why are we here?  
  
Quatre: *skips in looking all happy*  
Morning everyone! The sun is shining! The birds are singing! The sky is blue! Oh, how I love nature!  
  
Wufei: Should you kill him or should I?  
  
Duo: Ne, let the blonde eco-freak do his thing.  
  
Wufei: *sighs* Fiiiiine, hey, where's Trowa?  
  
Quatre: He was standing on the beach, just staring out to sea.  
  
Heero: I knew something was up with him....... he's so quiet..... HE'S PLOTTING AGAINST US ALL!  
  
Duo: *thwap* Aren't I supposed to be the dumb one?  
  
Heero: No.... *points at Quatre who is dancing with butterflies* ....he is  
  
Quatre: Tra la la, butterflies are so graceful! They're like.....cantelopes!  
  
Duo: He scares me.  
  
Wufei: He scares us all.  
  
Heero: I have a gun you know, can't we just shoot him?  
  
Duo: No, this could be fun!  
  
Heero: Yeah.... so, what are we supposed to do on this island?  
  
Treize: I'm glad you asked Heero, you see, you all have to survive together, to work as a team, because I believe that.....  
  
(a loud bang is heard and Treize falls down......cheer)  
  
Heero: Hehe, if I have to be stuck on an island, I DO NOT want to be stuck with that freak.  
  
Quatre: Heero! You have destroyed part of nature! And now my dear Treize, your body shall become one with the earth that bore you.  
  
Wufei: O.....K O.O;  
  
Duo: That was weird.  
  
Heero: UGH! *blasts Treize's body with his gun some more*  
  
Quatre: TRRRRREEEEEEIIIIIIZZZZZZZZZEEEEEE! *slaps Heero*  
  
Wufei: Oh great, we have a Relena wannabe over here.  
  
Heero: *points his gun to his head* I'll do it, I will. I'll......I'll....do it! *trembles*  
  
Quatre: *slaps Heero again* DON'T DO IT HEERO!  
  
Heero: Look baka, if I have to be stuck on an island with you for more than five seconds, life ain't worth living.  
  
Duo: Cut the guy some slack, he was abused as a child.  
  
Quatre: Yes, my parents kicked me out of the only place I could call home.  
  
Duo: We feel for you....... NOT  
  
Wufei: Look, can we PLEASE figure out something to do than diss Britney Spears.  
  
Quatre: I like Britney Spears :(  
  
Heero: THAT'S IT! *pulls trigger, nothing happens* Oops, I wasted all my on ammo on Treize.  
  
Duo: Argh, that guy is NOT worth wasting your bullets on.....can I knock you out with my ponytail?  
  
Heero: No, because that would be gay.  
  
Duo: Oh...right.  
  
Wufei: He-llo!? Guy on edge over here waiting for something to do!  
  
Heero: Oh go blow it your ear freak.  
  
Wufei: IS THAT A CHALLENGE!?  
  
Heero: No...  
  
Wufei: Good..... *sneers*  
  
Quatre: *starts singing* The hills are alive, with the sound of muuuuuuuusic.......  
  
Heero: NO NO NO! ARGH! I'M GOIN' NUTS! I'M GONNA GO SEE WHAT TROWA IS DOIN'!  
  
(Heero leaves)  
  
Duo and Wufei: Wait for us! *dash after him*  
  
Quatre: *still singing* I go to the hills, when my heart is looooonely.......  
  
(at the beach)  
  
Heero: Hey Trowa! What are ya doin'?  
  
Trowa: Contemplating life.  
  
Duo: Can we join you?   
  
Trowa: No.  
  
Wufei: Please, please, PLEASE! We had to put up with freakazoid and his love of nature.  
  
Trowa: You only say that, because you don't UNDERSTAND nature.  
  
Duo: Not another fruitcake.....  
  
Trowa: I am not a fruitcake, more like the cake your mom makes, dark and mysterious.  
  
Duo: OI! *tries to attack Trowa*  
  
Heero: Calm down, he's obviously lost it.  
  
Wufei: *quickly suggests something* Can we eat?  
  
Duo: Yes, if we can find anything to eat on this damned island.....  
  
Heero: I think I saw some berries on the way over, let's go back!  
  
(they all run back, leaving Trowa alone, who is just standing there, looking blank)  
  
Trowa: The sea is so blue, like......... cantelopes.  
  
(back at the hut)  
  
Heero: Hey, I think I hear someone moaning!  
  
Duo: Let's go see!  
  
(they all go to the bush)  
  
Wufei: It's....Nature Boy.  
  
Quatre: I ated the purpleberries.....they taste like......buuuuuurning!  
  
Wufei: I guess that's breakfast gone.  
  
Heero: Let's go hunt crabs.  
  
Duo: Yay.....  
  
(they go back to the beach)  
  
Heero: *points* Trowa is STILL there!  
  
Wufei: Just leave him, he's in his little fruitcake world. *snigger*  
  
Duo: OK, so then, let's rustle up some crabs! *starts digging*  
  
Heero: Hey, I found a purty shell!  
  
Wufei: *thwap* FIND ME....ERRR....I MEAN US SOME DAMN CRABS!  
  
Duo: Keep diggin', diggin', diggin', diggin' YEAH!  
  
Heero: Please, don't sing. Please.  
  
Duo: Fine, you're just jealous of my wonderful voice.  
  
Heero: Oh puh-lease.....  
  
Wufei: I got one! I got one! OW! I don't got one! *sniff*  
  
Heero: I'll get it *does a sort of James Bond kinda thing*  
HIIIIIIIIIIIII-YAH! *pounces*  
  
Duo: He did it. He got the crab! YAY!  
  
Wufei: Can I have it?  
  
Heero: No, MINE!  
  
Wufei: *sniffs* OK.....  
  
(Heero, using his interlect, fries the crab using the sun and reflections off of the water. He sits there, eating it)  
  
Duo: I got one!  
  
Wufei: You baka, that's a gold ring!  
  
Duo: Ohhhh *throws it back in the water*  
Purty ripples!  
  
Wufei: *anime sweatdrop* Anyway, I've found one, and it's MINE! HAAAAAAI!  
  
Duo: Can we share?  
  
Wufei: NO! *eats his crab raw*  
  
Duo: Awwww..... *sniffles* All I wanted was an ickle bit of cwab..... *sob*  
  
Wufei: Ahhhh, quit blubberin'  
  
Narrator: Well, that was a fun morning!  
  
All GW pilots: NO IT WASN'T BAKA  
  
Narrator: Ehehe.......tune in next time, where we see what these guys do in the afternoon!  
  
All GW pilots: Is Quatre in it?  
  
Narrator: Quatre's probably dead....  
  
Quatre: I'm not dead..... MWA HA HA!  
  
Heero: O.O;  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


  



	2. Afternoon and Evening

gw2

**All The Gundam Pilots on An Island: Part 2  
******I do not own Gundam Wing, nor do I intend to.  
  


Narrator: Welcome back!  
  
Wufei: Just get on with our damn afternoon, baka!  
  
Narrator: Gundam Wing: The Island is sponsored by Mama's Pork Rinds.  
If it ain't mamma's, it's Kaio-sama's!  
  
Wufei: Yeah...... -.-  
  
(Afternoon)  
  
(just to fill you in a little bit. Heero, Wufei and Duo have been on the beach eating crabs and discussing stuff, whilst Trowa has been contemplating life and Quatre has been....what the hell has been Quatre doing!?)  
  
Quatre: Ah, thank you Mr. Squirrel for curing me of those evil poison berries.  
  
Mr. Squirrel: No problemo!  
  
(back at the beach)  
  
Wufei: So, what do we do now?  
  
Duo: We take off our clothes and go skinny dipping?  
  
Heero: NOT ON YOUR LIFE!  
  
Duo: OK, so then, what do YOU suggest we do?  
  
Wufei: Why don't we explore this place?  
  
Heero and Duo: Good idea! I just hope we don't run into Eco-Freak.  
  
Wufei: Well then, let's go!  
  
(they all get up and go for a walk)  
  
Trowa: The sand, so warm, so gold like....cantelopes.  
  
(in the jungle)  
  
Duo: Are we there yet!?  
  
Heero: No!  
  
Duo: Are we there yet!?  
Wufei: NO!  
  
Duo: I'm boooooored!  
  
Heero and Wufei: WILL YOU STOP THAT!?  
  
Duo: I hafta go potty......  
  
Heero and Wufei: Fine, there's a tree, tinkle on it like the dog that you are.  
  
Duo: I don't have my safety seat!  
  
Heero: IT'S A TREE BAKA! JUST PULL DOWN YOUR PANTS AND GO!  
  
Duo: OK guys, don't look!  
  
Wufei: What do you take us for, Duo?  
  
Duo: A couple of sad losers?  
  
Heero: Don't make me tie you to that tree with your ponytail!  
  
Duo: Alright, alright! I'm going! *tinkle, tinkle, squelch*  
  
Heero: You are sick.......  
  
Duo: Got toilet paper?  
  
Wufei: Just use a leaf!  
  
Duo: I CAN'T REACH IT!  
  
Heero: Well I ain't turnin' around.....  
  
Duo: I NEED TO WIPE!  
  
Wufei: Here *throws him a bunch of leaves*  
Use it or lose it.  
  
Duo: Hey, this hurts!  
  
Wufei: JUST WIPE!  
  
Duo: *wipes* Now then, how do I flush this thing?  
  
Heero: You don't, you leave your mess there and hope that a rabid tiger doesn't think you're scent marking in his patch.  
  
Duo: Okies *zips up* Where do I wash my hands?  
  
Wufei: Just live with it.  
  
Duo: Mommy always said to wipe your hands.  
  
Heero: Forget what mommy says and get your ass moving! These mosquitos are irritating.....  
  
(they walk on.... meanwhile, back at the beach)  
  
Trowa: The birds are so graceful....like cantelopes.  
  
(back in the jungle)  
  
Duo: I'm huuuuuungry and tiiiiiiired and booooooored!  
  
Wufei: Who's idea was it to bring the baby?  
  
Heero: Wasn't mine.  
  
Duo: WAAAA! I smushed a buggy :(  
  
Heero: Duo, let me get this straight, you KILLED thousands of people and you have problems squishing a bug!?  
  
Duo: It was a purty buggy though! All yellow and red and black, reminded me of one time when I was drawing a purty picture with my crayons, it was so purty......  
  
Wufei: SHUT UP! SHUT UP!  
  
Duo: Okies *sniffs*  
  
Heero: Shall we continue? This jungle is annoying.  
  
Wufei: I thought you liked the wilderness.  
  
Heero: I do, but HE'S here! *looks at Duo*  
  
Duo: *has a caterpillar on his arm* Mr Fluffy Wuffy Caterpillar, crawling up my arm!  
  
Wufei: *sigh* Point made, let's go back to the beach and catch some sun!  
  
(back at the beach)  
  
Trowa: The sun is so blinding......like cantelopes.  
  
(back to the jungle)  
  
Duo: A wimoweh, a wimoweh, a wimoweh, a wimoweh *carries on*  
  
Heero: In the jungle, the mighty jungle, the lion sleeps toniiiiiiight!  
  
Wufei: In the jungle, the quiet jungle, the lion sleeps toniiiiiiiiight!  
  
All: A eeeeeee! Ai ya ya! Na we om bomba wey!  
  
Quatre: *bursts out of nowhere* In the village, the little village....  
Heero: NANI!? Where'd he come from?  
  
Quatre: Out of nowhere.  
  
Wufei: D'oy!  
  
Quatre: What's mean?  
  
Wufei: I dunno, just thought it suited the moment.  
  
Quatre: Have ya missed meh!?  
  
All: NO!  
  
Quatre: Awww, you guys are such jokers!  
  
Duo: No, we're serious this time.  
  
Wufei: Dead serious.  
  
Heero: We don't like you eco-freak.  
  
Quatre: You mean it? :(  
  
All: HAI!  
  
Quatre: I'll guess I'll just be going now *sniffs*  
  
(Quatre walks off)  
  
Heero: That was fun, now then, to the beach!  
  
(at the beach.... you know what's coming)  
  
Trowa: The fish are so slippery......like cantelopes.  
  
(somewhere in the jungle)  
  
Duo: Are we there YET!?  
  
Heero: *sighs* No, we've been walking around this damn jungle for HOURS, it's starting to get dark!  
  
Duo: Dark!? I'm scared of the dark! *crouches behind Wufei*  
  
Wufei: Get back onna, you're cramping my style.  
  
Heero: I think we'd better get out of here, who knows what strange creatures could come out at night...........  
  
Duo: STRANGE CREATURES! AAAAAIIIEEEEEEE! *hides behind a tree*  
  
Heero: C'mon guys, let's just do as the animals do.  
  
Duo: *comes out from behind tree* Poop on trees and attack people?  
  
Heero: No, let's use our instincts to try and figure out where we are.  
  
Wufei: I think that I've seen that flower before, maybe we're on the right track!  
  
Heero: Great! Do you remember which direction we were walking in?  
  
Wufei: Nope.  
  
Heero: *groan* OK, let's just keep walking, we're BOUND to get out of here soon!  
  
(an hour later)  
  
Duo: I'm tiiiiiiired! I wanna go home!  
  
Wufei: Be quiet baka!  
  
Heero: It really is getting dark you know.....  
  
Wufei: Don't tell me you're afraid as well!  
  
Heero: Nope, I just like scaring Duo. *laughs*  
  
Duo: Heeeeey, nuffair :(  
  
Heero: Fine fine...... DUO! LOOK OUT! MONSTER!  
  
Duo: Monster! WHERE!? *dives behind Wufei*  
  
Wufei: Grrrrr.......  
  
(back at the beach....just for kicks.....)  
  
Trowa: That drowning man is so helpless.......like cantelopes.  
  
(back in the jungle :P)  
  
Heero: Hehe, I do that just for kicks!  
  
Duo: *sniffs* You're howwible, I'm gonna tell on you!  
  
Heero: Ooooo, so scared, big bad teddy gonna come and beat me up!  
  
Duo: Hehe, you just wait..... *grin*  
  
Heero: I'm looking forward to it......  
  
Wufei: Hey guys! I think I see light!  
  
Duo and Heero: WHERE!?  
  
Wufei: There! *points to a gap*  
Heero: Me first! *pushes past Wufei, widens gap*  
  
Duo: The beach is so lovely when bathed in silver moonlight!  
  
Heero: AT LAST! WE'RE OUT OF THAT FRIGGIN' JUNGLE!  
  
Wufei: I kinda liked that little stroll.  
  
Heero: The little stroll that lasted over 3 hours.....  
  
Wufei: *anime sweatdrop*  
  
Heero: ...It's Trowa  
  
Trowa: ....  
  
Wufei: How are ya Trowa?  
  
Trowa: ....  
  
Heero: Fiiiiiiiiiiiiiine, let's go find Quatre and annoy him!  
  
Quatre: That won't be necessary Heero, I'm right here *sniffs*  
  
Heero: Great! It's eco-freak! How are ya?  
  
Quatre: Cold, hungry, upset.......nature is so harsh and unforgiving.  
  
Duo: That's not what ya said this morning!  
  
Narrator: So, the Gundam Pilots have survived a day on *the* island!   
Tune in next time to see what happens when they get picked up and go home!  
  
  
  
  
  
  


  


  


  



	3. Night and "The Conclusion"

gw3

**All The Gundam Pilots on An Island: The Conclusion  
******Do I HAVE to do a disclaimer!?  
Alright, alright, I don't own GW blah blah blah.....  
  


Narrator: Hi fans!  
  
*crickets chirp*  
  
We hope you've enjoyed the boys' day out on the island!  
  
*silence*  
  
Wufei: CHEER YOU BAKAS OR I'LL BLAST YOU TO HELL AND BACK WITH NATAKU!  
  
*cheers, roses are thrown, applause*  
  
Wufei: That's better :)  
  
Narrator: Now we find out how and where they get picked up, and what their verdict is of the whole day.  
  
*crowd cheers *  
  
(Night)  
  
Duo: Is the damn helicopter here yet?  
  
Wufei: No......  
  
Trowa: Helicopters make so much noise......like cantelopes.  
  
Heero: That guy is more disturbed than eco-freak *looks over at Quatre who is asleep*  
  
Duo: Let's all sing a song while we wait! Kum-by-ya my Lord, Kum-by-ya!  
  
Heero: I'm too tired to sing.......  
  
Wufei: Can we tell ghost stories?  
  
Duo: NO!  
  
Trowa: Ghost stories are so scary....like....  
  
Heero: YOU!  
  
Trowa: No, like cantelopes.  
Heero: ...  
  
Wufei: So *yawns*, have we all enjoyed ourselves?  
  
Everybody in unison apart from Quatre: NO  
  
Wufei: I think I'll hit the sack, it doesn't look like the helicopter is coming tonight....  
  
*loud helicopter noise above*  
  
Red haired lady (oh, c'mon, ya'll know who she is...): Attention Gundam Pilots! Please climb this ladder in an orderly fashion!  
  
Heero: Orderly!? I'LL GIVE YOU ORDERLY! *scrambles up the ladder*  
  
Duo: Should we wake Quatre?  
  
Wufei: N'ah, let's leave him here!  
  
Trowa: I can't do that.... *picks up Quatre*  
  
Duo: You're a freak..... *climbs ladder*  
  
Wufei: Trowa, you scare me.... *climbs ladder*  
  
Trowa: I am like a cantelope in so many ways... *climbs ladder whilst carrying Quatre*  
  
Red haired lady: Soooo, now that everyone is here...did you enjoy your little vacation that I, the Great Washu, planned for you?  
  
Wufei: No we did not.......  
  
Duo: It sucked.  
  
Heero: It was worse than Relena.  
  
Duo: Dude, NOTHING is worse than Relena.  
  
Heero: Good point, it was ALMOST as bad as her, and that's still VERY bad.  
  
Washu: You don't appreciate what I do for you people!?  
  
All: NO!  
  
A: Don't listen to them Washu!  
B: You are a genius Washu!  
  
All: *anime sweatdrop*  
  
Washu: Ain't it the truth?  
  
Narrator AKA WASHU (hehe): Sooooo, I hope you all enjoyed this little show I made, of course, it was made by me, the Great Washu!  
Sponsored by Mama's Pork Rinds!  
If it ain't mamma's, it's Kaio-sama's!  
See ya!  
  
A/N: How did ya like that? Please don't flame me, this was written out of boredom. Please review this piece of crap, it would make me very, very happy :D


End file.
